Wednesday, March 24, 2010

frustrated......

I'm huge and uncomfortable and anemic and too old to be doing this and I don't think the veins in my legs will ever be the same.....among other things.



I'm really trying to LiveStrong and everything, and I know I need to somehow enjoy this & embrace the miracle of this beautiful time in my life........blah, blah, blah, especially since this is my last one & all......



But really? Stop & smell the roses when your ankles are as big as your calves???



The truth is, I am so, so, so excited for this baby girl, but this has been a rather tough pregnancy. I've never been so tired & useless in my 3rd trimester like this.



And it's freaking me out! But not in a hyper way. In a slo-mo kind of way.



I had big plans for home organization & decor updating & photo projects.......... & decorating her nursery! Still not done!



But instead I'm watching the last few weeks of semi-productivity slip through my fingers as I nap on the couch!



Because I've had enough babies to remember how it's after you have the baby that you really get absolutely nothing done.



I've always associated productivity with happiness & satisfaction, so this is hard for me. My best days are when I've knocked a bunch of things off my to-do list.



I need to somehow make peace with non-productivity. Embrace it. Find joy in unfinished projects. Smile at piles of stinky laundry and walk on by. Hmmmmm.......



I wonder if you can feed a baby & work on the computer at the same time?..........







And since I can't post without a picture, here's a random one.
Max sitting for me while I do lighting test-shots, finishing up his daily after-school-bowl-of-icecream.
Classic.

5 comments:

Del and Tina said...

Nicole, I feel your pain. I'm glad I'm not the only one. I was so frustrated at my doctor's appointment last Wed. that I almost started crying. I was hoping for high blood pressure, anything so i could have this baby early, but NO, my blood pressure was lower and I had LOST 2 pounds. Ugh. I feel so absolutely wiped out and yet I want to nest, nest, nest, and then take care of 2 little ones all day. It's tough. It will be over soon, huh? That's what everyone has been telling me for weeks now. :) Hang in there. --Tina

Michelle said...

Hang in there, Nik.
Not too much longer.
I wished I lived closer so that I could help... :(

johnsonteammom said...

I'm nursing the baby as I sit here and tell you that the last one is really fun. You'll get there and see that it was worth the journey. Hang in there.

The McGraths said...

I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL!!! So, Let me help! I would love o have Gus or even come help you do projects for the baby's room. Just let me know!

lizzyandpop said...

Nicole, you are the best!!! I miss you! Who else has your humor or sarcasm? These two are of the staples of life.

I miss being around you as you make ANYONE feel better - I saw it in the Beehives and I certainly felt it myself.

Ok, I know we didn't move too far, wait! we didn't move. Oh well, that's what a ward division will do to you.

Can't wait to see another beautiful Mason baby.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...